Indiana LGBT Thoughts on SB101 and RFRA

Do Unto Others

Indiana LGBT Thoughts on SB101 and RFRAfree·dom (noun)

the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint.

By now I’m sure you have all heard a thing or two about the law that was recently signed in Indiana. Don’t worry – I’m not going to go getting all political on you, but I am going to share my thoughts on the matter. Especially seeing as it hits so close to home for me on more than one level. I’ve shared my coming out story in the past so I won’t go boring y’all with the details on that, but I did want to take a minute sound off on a couple of things.

Truth be told, I was actually born and raised in Indiana, but ever since a young age claimed Louisville as home (for reasons I’ll make apparent later on). Besides growing up across the bridge I also grew up incredibly involved in the Church and even attended a Baptist school from 1st until 9th grade. I believe in a higher power, but I do not believe in organized religion for reasons such as SB101 and because to be 100% honest organized religion had me living in complete and utter fear for the majority of my younger years, and the Jesus that I know preaches of love and acceptance, not fear and hate. 

Growing up gay in Southern Indiana was definitely one of the more trying experiences of my life. I still remember cowering in the corner of a bathroom stall when I was in 3rd or 4th grade because my mom was running late to pick me up and a handful of the older guys at school decided to call me every gay slur in the book. I also remember skipping so much school that I was suspended twice, getting shoved into lockers, and being called “queer” any time I would venture in the hallways. My school knew about it, my teachers knew about it, and yet nothing was done about it. 4 of out 10 LGBT youth say that the community in which they live is not accepting of LGBT people, and I was one of those 4 out of 10 LGBT youth. Now the state is saying that it’s ok for businesses to turn their backs on LGBT individuals state-wide, and that they government will turn a blind eye on it just like my school’s administration did? Seems like a great idea to me, especially since it worked so well back in the 1950’s and all.

I always felt like I was on the outside looking in. Never quite sure what made me different, or why it mattered. But I knew something was different. I was different from the other guys – they wanted to play basketball, and I wanted to read books and cook in the kitchen with my mom. Because of that I never fit in. I’ve honestly been called queer for as long as I can remember, even in the 1st grade (if that doesn’t tell you that I was born this way then I honestly don’t know what would). Which really bummed me out back then. I mean, can you imagine going through all the emotions that already come with puberty and adding to that the list of things LGBT individuals have to deal with? It’s enough to drive a sane adult crazy, let alone a kid. But then I realized nothing was wrong with me, nothing at all. I was exactly who I was meant to be. And I fully understand that some folks may not see it that way, I really do. We will have to agree to disagree on that fact. 

The passing of the RFRA in Indiana sets the stage for all LGBT individuals in the state to be put into the same situation/situations that I outlined earlier. Because no matter how pretty the opposition paints this up it is in essence bullying. Bullying under the guise of religious freedom. 

I guess what I’m trying to get at here is that everyone is entitled to whatever opinion their religion affords them, but not at the expense of other people. If you’re really a Christian then you’ll remember what was said in John 8:7, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone..”, and if you’re like me you’ll remember that “Defend Equality, Love Unites.”

While I’m not advocating a complete boycott of Indiana – because I know plenty of equality minded folks that own businesses in the state, I am advocating for everyone to open their eyes and ears to the situation at hand. Our forefathers founding this country to escape religious persecution, and now in the 21st century our elected officials are signing bills into law that are persecuting those that don’t fit the mold. I understand that Clinton signed a RFRA into law in 1993 and admit to not fully knowing what all that bill entails, but regardless of that fact it was over TWENTY years ago. Look how far we’ve come in those 20 years, why set the country back now when we’ve already came so far. 

Last but not least and my tip for the week: do unto others as you’d have them do unto you. At the end of the day, it really is as simple as that. 


  • Michael Macalos March 30, 2015 at 10:27 PM

    Always love reading your posts bro! it’s so much fun and interesting 😀

  • Tyler Ross March 31, 2015 at 12:59 AM

    This all hits a little close to home. I went to an extremely conservative Christian school for many years and see a lot of commonality between these laws and how my teachers approached the subject in school.

    Give it a few more year and this kind of Indiana law will be on the wrong side of history in the textbooks.

    • The Kentucky Gent March 31, 2015 at 12:09 PM

      Couldn’t agree more, it’s definitely headed in that direction.

  • Megan Flanagan March 31, 2015 at 1:52 AM

    This is beautiful! My brother was bullied for being gay, I would get into so many fights defending him when we were younger. As I get older I realize how fucked up this world is and how cruel people can be. Why can’t people just let others be happy and be who they are. It’s as simple as that.

    xo, Megan

    • The Kentucky Gent March 31, 2015 at 12:09 PM

      Indeed, it really is as simple as that. We’ll get there.. one day!

  • Jennifer Arrow March 31, 2015 at 11:24 AM

    Very well said. I look forward to your posts every day.

    • The Kentucky Gent March 31, 2015 at 12:09 PM

      Thanks Jennifer! That means a lot. I really appreciate it.

  • Kelly in the City March 31, 2015 at 6:43 PM

    I just found your site through Blair, and I love it. What an amazing post. Thank you so much for sharing such a powerful story and piece. The country has made a lot of progress, but we’re just not quite there yet. Thanks for getting us one step closer. 🙂

    Kelly | Kelly in the City

    • The Kentucky Gent April 1, 2015 at 6:15 PM

      Gotta love Blair! And secondly, thank you! I appreciate the kind words, plus you checking out my site. We’re definitely heading in the right direction, even if it is an uphill battle.

  • Joey Ciotti April 1, 2015 at 12:42 AM

    Beautifully written. Growing up in Ohio I have had some similar experiences in school. I still remember a kid telling me in high school what the Bible says about gay people going to Hell (I wasn’t out and wouldn’t come out until I was in college). I have been a follower of your blog for a long time!

    • The Kentucky Gent April 1, 2015 at 6:16 PM

      Thanks Joey! I’m glad you could relate, and thank you for following along. I really appreciate it.

  • Shot of Bourbon • The Kentucky Gent April 1, 2015 at 5:01 AM

    […] the last couple of days and my latest post this t-shirt from Her Kentucky seems more fitting than usual. I definitely realize that […]

  • The Style Editrix April 1, 2015 at 7:40 PM

    I am so sorry to hear you were bullied growing up. Those people should be ashamed of themselves and the adults even more so for not speaking up for you. Move to LA where your sexuality is not even a question. Hang in there with all of those crazies on Twitter. Block, block, block!!

    xo, Ashley

    • The Kentucky Gent April 2, 2015 at 1:36 PM

      Everything happens for a reason! BUT moving to LA is definitely on the to-do list by next year 😉 SO you’ll be hearing from me in regards to helping me find a place.

  • Rise and Shine • The Kentucky Gent April 3, 2015 at 5:00 AM

    […] with the RFRA acts + the impending shit storm of comments that came my way after I made my stance on the matter clear, and my two-a-day runs; my little body + mind are beyond wiped. But for now, it’s time […]

  • Brahm (alfred lives here) April 5, 2015 at 11:06 PM

    Lovely post, beautifully written… thanks for sharing. I had similar experiences growing up and am still astonished by the lack of feeling and compassion of some people out there. The arc of time always swings forward towards progress though… the bigots are on the wrong side of history.

    • The Kentucky Gent April 8, 2015 at 10:33 PM

      They definitely are, that’s why we gotta keep on fighting the good fight.


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